The Dark Queen :D

Discussion in 'Fan-Fiction' started by Sadowmancer, Jul 23, 2016.

  1. Sadowmancer

    Sadowmancer Sadistic Queen

    Feb 10, 2015

    Chapter 1: The Family

    In the Great Basin of Zul'tal, resided a Grand Castle with small houses surrounding the perimeter of it. In the Castle lived a family of aristocrats, they were viewed highly among the castle inhabitants. The Castle was a safe structure, walls high enough to block a catapult, the guards were trained to the highest to protect the family. Ah, the family. In the family of aristocrats was Queen Merci, a fair beautiful woman who's beauty resonated anbrought joy to all who saw her. King William, a respectable King and a caring Father. Last but not least the mysterious Princess Miylynn. An odd one, she would have little to say at ceremonies and always have a serious almost stuck face on her as if bewitched to keep that tone forever.

    In this Family all townsfolk believed they had a loving.... Caring......close.... Relationship. But they do not know the truth. King William wasn't all there upstairs, he would drink to forget but never succeeded to do so. The Queen was a cocky woman that believed she was to be treated as a goddess and none the less, to have everything done for her. The Princess tried to run away many times but failed to do so. The inhabitants did not know this.

    One day the King received note that an army is making their way to invade the Castle and loot all the treasures. The army is called the Dark Knights and is lead by a mysterious yet great leader described as The Dark Paladin. Quickly to react the king sent out a small militia to stop this army.

    Days have passed and no word of the milita has been heard, until the great Captain of the Royal family guard came back with two out of the 20 guards sent. He said that the Dark Paladin himself took on all of them. His strength was misjudged and caused the death of many. He had a Dark aura that struck fear in the militia. That the Dark Knights would be here in one to two days. The King grew worried about the situation and began telling the guards to train harder, the king spoke," They will not hurt anyone else."

    :D hope y'all liked and I'll be adding in more chapters, Ships, additional characters and much more.

    <3 Miylynn​
    Last edited: Jul 23, 2016
    Jacke0, ~Xarams~, Riley12301 and 4 others like this.
  2. Sadowmancer

    Sadowmancer Sadistic Queen

    Feb 10, 2015
    Chapter 2: The Feud

    King William moved left and right debating in his head what to do. He spoke with a hard tone.
    "I don't know what to do! I can't call the neighboring Tribes Because of what I did to them."
    Miylynn walks into the room with a Serious face.
    "Father." She spoke in a light tone.
    "Mother wishes to see you in the hall."
    William spoke in a grouchy tone.
    "Tell your mother I'm busy."
    "Ok." Miylynn spoke in a light tone.

    One day till the invasion.

    "Stand Guard," yelled the Royal Guard to the Elite Guards. "King Wiliam told me to train you guys to the fullest. And that's what we have been training for these last da-"
    A rock interrupted his speech. The Royal Guard looks up and sees Miylynn throwing rocks at him.
    She speaks,"Boooooo."
    "Excuse me Madam but I'm busy." Said the guard in a superior tone.
    "Oh," Miylynn said. "I didn't know you were training, just looks like your talking the whole time. With your training we might as well just give up-" King William yelled Milynn name.
    "Oh boy."
    Miylynn walks into the hall and sees her father drinking. And many more jugs around him empty. He's been drinking a lot. And her mother staring at herself in the mirror. Her vanity is too much.

    "Yes father?" Miylynn said in a curious tone.
    "Your mother..... And you will go...... To the underground base and stay there during the invasion." Talking as if he has never spoken before.

    "Oh Will You should stop drinking." Merci said in a snotty voice.

    "You should stop looking in the mirror you ain't getting pretty that way." William said

    "You prick." Merci stood up as if she was to slap him.

    William stood up and said," Sit down, you won't do anything but obey me."

    Merci walks closer to him and slaps him.

    William looks back at her and slams his jug at her head causing her to fall on the glass table shattering it on her head. Blood pouring from her head.

    Miylynn screamed and ran.

    The guards came in and see Merci bleeding.

    The question the King and he said she tripped and fell. He yelled to call the doctor.

    The king goes and finds Miylynn in her room. He kicks open the door and grabs her by the hair.

    "YOU will NOT speak of what happened." He said in a threatening tone.

    Miylynn punches him in his crotch and runs.

    Miylynn goes to the kitchen and takes a knife. And she goes under a table.

    She sees her father come in and yells at the cooks to leave.

    Miylynn holds her breath and he walks past her.

    She sees the opportunity and slashes at his foot causing him to fall in agony.

    Miylynn gets up and looks down at father. He flops around and sees her daughter looking down on him.

    William kicks her and she falls he pins her down and begins chocking her.

    Miylynn panicking starts hitting him to stop.

    She gets the force to put her hands in his eyes and squeeze down.

    William immediately stops and yells

    Miylynn now on fours behind panting, trying to catch her breath.

    She gets the knife and goes to stab him but he slashed at her too. They both feel to the ground blood spilling. A cook goes to investigate the screams and begins yelling.

    With her force Miylynn said to her father.

    "See you in hell."

    Later the day around 2am. Miylynn wakes up and sees a bandage around her stomach. In pain she couldn't even get up. She sees the town doctor looking at her and saying good you're awake.

    Miylynn examines the room and sees its her headroom.

    "Where's my mother?," she asked in a weak tone.

    The doctor looks down and says," She lost too much blood and your father couldn't survive the strike of the knife on his chest. Guess that makes you Queen eh? Not to push you to anything but the whole town is frantic, everyone is yelling starting protest to make a new king. We need a feat leader and the invasion is starting tomorrow! Princess we need to prepare and so much more! Just....Just rest the guards are training. take it easy princess."

    Miylynn looks in the ceiling and says," Don't call me princess. Address me as your Queen."
    Last edited: Jul 23, 2016
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  3. Sadowmancer

    Sadowmancer Sadistic Queen

    Feb 10, 2015
    Chapter 3: The invasion

    Miylynn walks to the window of her castle and stares into the grassy plains. She's wearing a long dark dress and her mothers crown on her head. Her smirk is the most defined. Miylynn can hear the rants and continuous chants of "The King is dead!" From her room.

    A guard approaches Miylynn.

    "Miyly-Queen....we wish to know what you want to do for the invasion that's bound to happen today."

    Miylynn turns around her black dress sways.

    "I have a plan Peter," Miylynn moved closer to him and placed a hand on his armored chest. She leans into his ear and says," Just you wait." She chuckles at the end.

    Miylynn goes to her mothers room and investigates, obviously her mother would keep secrets in her room. And Miylynn knew one that would help the kingdom. Her mother said once there is a book that belonged to a great witch that died to the hands of your father, the book possessed a great power that will unleash to the one who opens it and reads the chant. But no one has done so in fear of summoning the witch again, but at the cost of what's happening it's worth to risk it.

    The room had a grand bed in the middle with a rather large window looking out into the town. Opening dressers and cabnets Miylynn discovers a Key decorated with elaborate Designs. Recalling the rooms in the castle, Miylynn only remembers one room which is always locked.

    Miylynn walks down the staircase and into the hall seeing two servants wearing a white and black outfit with buckets of water cleaning the blood. Fear is struck into them when they see her walk down.

    Right when Miylynn is going to go near the door one of the servants speaks in total fear, stuttering and shaking. " Uh Queen, we-we wonder if you will be attending your parents funeral?"

    "Ah, that's right. Maybe you two should continue to clean and not worry aboit me at this moment." Miylynn said in a sharp tone, "I have more important matters to attend."

    Miylynn makes her way to the locked door and inserts the key. A pop can be heard. Once the lock opens, Miylynn pushes open the heavy wooden door. Inside Miylynn discovers all of these weird items. A chest full of Notes regarding to the great witch, drawings depicting what she looks like, "An ugly bitch that's for sure," Miylynn mutters. Walking further into the room she sees a book with a Glass dome surrounding it. "I found it," Miylynn said. Lifting up the dome Miylynn picks up the book. Heavier than she expected. She opens the book and sees blank pages.

    "Where is it, she said there is a chant in this bo-, here it is." A smile grows on her face.
    The text said
    "Lan'guth mardan Tu'kin hala'na."

    Miylynn read the text out loud and felt the book becoming....hotter?

    It was burning? Miylynn drops the book to the floor and looks at her hands, they were actually red with the heat the book emitted.

    The book began flipping it's pages emitting a glowing light blinding Miylynn. Miylynn places her hands over her face to cover the light.

    She walks backwards to the door but it slammed shut.The servants hear the noise and rush. Knocking,"Are you okay in there? Hello Queen?"

    Miylynn could not respond the light was intoxicating her. Blurring her vision and speech.

    The book began floating. "What have I done?She began questioning this situation in her mind. The book suddenly stops and just drops to the floor. Confused by the whole situation Miylynn questions her own sanity, did she imagine the whole thing?

    She calmly walks over to the book and picks it up. She opens it and a thing reached to her arm. The thing was entirely black and as it came close to her arm it clamped it. The substance began growing. It was taking the shape of her arm. Miylynn began shaking her hand frantically trying to get it off. It wouldn't budge. The substance began growing faster and faster. Miylynn became immobilized for the substance carved into the ground. The servants knocked on the door. Calling for the Queen and asking what's happening. Miylynn couldn't talk, the substance covered her mouth
    Only the muffled sounds were heard. Miylynn saw the darkness covering her eyes.

    Worried to hear no sound the servants called over the guards to open the door. When they kicked open the door, they saw a dark what appeared to be chrysalis? The even weirder part was.... It was beating, pulsating. Almost as if it was an organism, a living entity.

    It was beating like a heart. A constant thumping. Guards confused point their spears at it. The guards asked where the queen was and the servants replied that that may be her. They just waited to see what would happen. And suddenly a hand protruded from the chrysalis. The guards quickly aim their spears at it. Suddenly another hand came out it. The two hands were dripping of a slimy substance. The two hands bent and both reached to the chrysalis. The guards were petrified and could only watch. Witchcraft they thought!

    The hands grasped the chrysalis and ripped open a hole. They kept opening it up, suddenly a pale woman with Raven dark hair appeared. The woman was covered in the slime and was naked. She took a deep breath as if she has never breathed before. She forced her body upwards reading her upper half but not the Lower half.

    Looking left and right with large dark beady eyes, She turned and looked at the guards. Those big beady black eyes staring into them. They pointed their spears at the woman and questioned who she was.The dark substance began breaking apart as if it completed what it was meant to. The unknown woman like a raven in a white room stood out.

    She walks back and picks up the book. She looks up sees the guards pointing weapons at them. She walks close to them and grabs both spears and bends them without hesitation. The strong metal which the spears were made of seemed to be as brittle as a dead leaf to her touch.

    The The guards just look up at the tall woman, she leans down and replies. The room felt darker and a lot more ominous. The guards sweating and feeling fear. Her voice is sharp but has a seductive tone to it.

    "My name is sadowmancer, and I am reborn."

    Chapter 3: The invasion part 2

    "Wh-what!." You can't be you died to the hands of King William. The guards shaking with fear and the two servants hiding behind them.

    Sadowmancer looks down at her book. "Oh is that what he's been saying? Hahahahaha, he simply cursed me into my book. But one cannot curse a great witch. I simply chanted a spell before I was sucked into the book. 20 years in that book did a number on my back. " Her dark eyes staring into the guards as if she is looking into their souls.

    "Now now, where is William, and that hag Merci?" She tilted her head at them.

    "They-they are dead, but you cannot be here go back from where you came from and bring back Miylynn you evil Bitch!" The guard spat at her.

    Sadowmancer places her finger on the guards face. "Is that anyway to address your majesty." Sadow raises her hand and the guards and servants go to their knees. "That's better, dead you said? Now that's funny and who killed them?"

    The guards and servants twitching, feeling no control of their own bodies.

    "ANSWER ME NOW." Sadow yells at them.

    "Miylyn, Miylynn ki-lled the king.......and the queen died to the hands of the King." The servants and guards moaning in pain feeling tired from the forced position on them.

    "Ah, I guess I'm the new queen here hence that basic bitch merci died." Sadow lifts her hand and the guards and servants are able to rise. "Now go fetch me some towels. "

    The servants rush out the room. They go to the Royal guard and tell him what happened. He tells his fleet and they move in. They enter that open stair case to see sadow in the middle sitting in an unknown throne. She must've broken the queens and kings throne and created her own.

    "Halt in the name of the King!" Royal guard Levesqmi shouts at her.

    Sadow still looking down at her book raises a hand.

    Levesqmi is suddenly picked up by an unknown entity and is feeling crushed by it.

    "Why look at this pathetic army. The Dark knight will be here and you'll all be dead. But I see (Sadow closes her book and stands up, still fully naked, guards trying not to look) all of you as worthy workers. So I will offer my help. "

    Sadow Chants a spell and dark Ravens encircle the Witch. A dress is created around her, black as a Ravens hair.

    "What's makes you think we wants your help you-you."

    Before the guard can finish Sadow instantly teleports in front of him and looks down at him. Fearful he shuts up and gulps.

    "Now that you are done (Sadow opens her hand and Levesqmi is dropped on the floor." You have a weak army, I know what the Dark paladin can do and he will kill you all without sweating."

    Coughing and breathing hard Levesqmi can barely speak, he manages to say,"How do you know what he can do!"

    Sadow looks at him and says sharply,"We used to be partners in crime. We would raid together and kill villages. Then he threw me, he thought I was holding him back with all their back line magic and strength is in melee. What an ass. Now (she says with a happier tone) I see he didn't care about my 'death', 20 years he had to rescue me. He didn't! So I will make him suffer, suffer in the darkest ways. But if I want to do that I must destroy his little army. And I can't waste my magic and mana with them. So I will summon some of my old friends to help you guys. Now you 5 come forward." She said in a sharp tone.

    The men quivering and shaking.
    "Don't worry you are doing this for the sake of protecting others and that's what you do sweeties." She said to them.

    She makes a cut in her wrist and drips the blood on their forehead. She goes to each one and says a different spell.

    The blood transforms from a small drop to a large drop quickly covering all five men in red blood. The blood hardening instantly.

    The first men she says
    "Savage, an old friend and Great brute. I summon you once more to fight by my side."
    The blood hardens and begins to crack. Where the guard's spine is located protruded a man. The man had a strong jaw, his muscles define.

    "Old friend, Tis I Sadowmancer." Sadow reads her book and Ravens encircle The Savage. When the Ravens finish he is coated in armor and two cutlasses. He wore skulls on his shoulders and a mudflat, the two cutlasses glowed red.

    The Savage bows down and says,"I will fight by your side till death my Queen."

    Miylynn walks to the next guard the blood hard already. She chants," Enchantress, I summon you from your long slumber. Come once again to sing your battle cry and inspire us all!" From the front of the guard came out a woman.

    "Eva, nice to see you again." Sadow says in a superior tone. The Ravens encircle Eva. Once completed, a flying book is by her side and she is holding a large drum. Tribal cloths she wears with several Battle paint on her face and arms.

    "Yes my queen, I will sing the songs of darkness and bring inspiration to our allies and weaken our enemies!" Eva said smiling

    (I'll be working on the other three by your guys reply so first three will be my next summons! Hope you are enjoying it so far. If you see any grammatical errors please tell. Thanks for all the support <3)
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2016
    mmg556 and The Savage like this.
  4. Sadowmancer

    Sadowmancer Sadistic Queen

    Feb 10, 2015
    Chapter 4: The New Queen
  5. Sadowmancer

    Sadowmancer Sadistic Queen

    Feb 10, 2015
    Chapter 5: Dark Seduction
  6. KatnissNeverclean

    KatnissNeverclean 3-1-17

    Mar 5, 2016
    Royal family? I should be part of this!

    (There's a typo in the first paragraph)
  7. rajinikanth

    rajinikanth THE DARK PALADIN

    Nov 13, 2014
    Tis is not a royal family where you decide who's the queen who's the prince, tis is a Royal family unlike any others. Where magic and war and powers beyond anyone's perception. Tis not a Royal family where you ring the bell and you shall be served in the silver plate loaded with dishes. It was the origin of all Royal families. Long before your Royal family was born. Do not be flattered by thy power. For there are power far beyond thy comprehension
    KatnissNeverclean likes this.
  8. The Savage

    The Savage Active Member

    Feb 20, 2016
    I like the story it's like the medieval age, however two days is not enough for soldiers to get strong what the King would most likely do was to gather more troops from the kingdom and perform like a draft like what they do when their running low on troops and would take anybody to help defend the kingdom. But good story
    Last edited: Jul 23, 2016
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  9. mmg556

    mmg556 Lena Oxton

    Mar 31, 2015
    Quite intriguing. A family that seems "perfect" to the outside, but is far from it on the inside can sure make for an interesting start. I like the dark undertone that this has, looking forward to the next chapter.
    Sadowmancer likes this.
  10. Erika

    Erika Imagine Dragons

    Feb 22, 2016
    All hail the Dark Paladin
    Can't wait for the next part lol
    rajinikanth likes this.
  11. ~Xarams~

    ~Xarams~ YouTuber

    Aug 10, 2014
    Dollhouse ~ Melanie Martinez
    Sadowmancer likes this.
  12. Average Player

    Average Player Da Sassy Owls

    Jun 3, 2016
    Long live the queen!
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2016
  13. Sadowmancer

    Sadowmancer Sadistic Queen

    Feb 10, 2015
    Someone got the reference!
  14. Sadowmancer

    Sadowmancer Sadistic Queen

    Feb 10, 2015
    Ah but the Kings Is delusional, and he thinks that he has the best army. Stay tuned for a turn of events that will happen in The Feud. :D
    Last edited: Jul 23, 2016
    The Savage likes this.
  15. Sadowmancer

    Sadowmancer Sadistic Queen

    Feb 10, 2015
    Fixed :D
    KatnissNeverclean likes this.
  16. Sadowmancer

    Sadowmancer Sadistic Queen

    Feb 10, 2015
    Chapter 2 is up. I'd like to hear your feedback and your predictions on chapter 3 :D thanks for the support!
  17. mmg556

    mmg556 Lena Oxton

    Mar 31, 2015
    Just a few critiques if you don't mind

    Being a bit more descriptive towards everything would help paint a brighter picture in our minds, I don't think we have an idea of how any of the characters look aside from their expression (drunk, serious, etc) and it would be nice to have a better visual of the setting.

    Also try to get more into your characters, it helps if you picture yourself as them and try to think of how they would act in certain situations and such. For example in this medievalish aristocratic society I would assume that people would be frantic and in terror with the loss of their leader/king just before a large invasion is to hit instead of being all whoopsie daisy guess this little girl is our leader alrighty, and I couldn't picture a person of this era saying "eh" (unless he's some weird immigrant from Canada =p)

    Still good but just try to work on some things
    Sadowmancer likes this.
  18. KatnissNeverclean

    KatnissNeverclean 3-1-17

    Mar 5, 2016
    I can't believe this disaster happened because of a slap.

    I should be in here!
  19. Sadowmancer

    Sadowmancer Sadistic Queen

    Feb 10, 2015
    The father was also drunk if that helps.
    KatnissNeverclean likes this.
  20. Sadowmancer

    Sadowmancer Sadistic Queen

    Feb 10, 2015
    I added a bit more detail to the last paragraph. And thanks I always accept constructive criticism. Next chapter I'll be sure to add more detail Because its The chapter that will hold a lot of information.
    KatnissNeverclean and mmg556 like this.

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